On the Outside looking Out …and Beyond

Uninterested in positions, promotions

My better half

The carefree outsider

The stronger part of me that

Without tomorrow’s fear

Leaps at life with a ferocity and

Lusts for passion and flesh

Seeking only love’s treasures

Not monetary wealth and acceptance

Into the soulless parade of the lost

Like the other part of me that

Awakens early without alarm

The inside betrayer

Deprived a reason to carry on

 

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Outdated

Forty-two years
in this motherfucker
we label civilization and
I can assure you'll never escape
the agonies of our creation
this, the post-industrial.

and like a crinkled old cassette
tape caught in the gears, we're
repaired, rewound and replayed,
the soundtrack to the machine
fading more every day,
erased and thrown away.

Celebrity Death Snatch

The whole idea of a celebrity sounds preposterous
if you really think about it.

Here, in this country
they've taken it way too far.

You see,
a majority of the people you encounter daily
are generally acting, portraying
someone or something else
either to benefit themselves in some way or 
in most cases, the person they were born
is just too damn unexciting.

Yet, with all this acting going on
people still idolize and value the opinion
of these celebrity actors and actresses who
without a pretty face 
or industry relations
would be just as average and poor
as the next struggling man or woman.

So now anytime there's an election
or a cause of some sort
these arrogant celebrity assholes
are given a podium 
to spew forth their televised wisdom
and phony empathy for others,
the act they should really be given awards for.

In fact, give awards to women
who said they loved me as well

and the "friends" that occupied the dead air
in this place I call Hell.

A Song Not of My Self

...because there's no such thing
as an army of one

...and you can't conceive 
with an avatar

...and corn syrup doesn't hydrate
your body, carbonated or otherwise

...and a grower of plants
is not a druggist

For druggists push chemical cures,
the growers preach medicine

...and helping only those in your circle
only makes you a selfish asshole

I sing a song not of my self

...because there's no such thing
as a one man army

...and when narcissists grasp for empathy
I'll retract my hand, turn away

...and save something pure

Black Label Savior

Broken glass conformity

Comforted as it’s crushed

To dust beneath tattered sneakers

As I pass by fads and failure

Where seven steps toward oblivion

Will get you black labeled

And noosed, a public nuisance

Beaten till proven guilty

Or zip-tied, tried

And maimed into martyrdom

 

Unstable Animal

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I've found my place
idly wandering, somewhere
between mystics and madmen,
an unstable animal, resigned
to the fact that I just don't care
about many things material,
about acceptance into the illusions
of worldly affairs,
about the consensus,
about being,
anything other than human,
a fate many try to avoid
on their accepted path
to self-destruction, vying
to be a conqueror, a god
among the common, striving
for accumulation and control,
but the unconventional I,
the unstable animal, strayed
far too often
from the way, the path resisted,
beyond starry eyes and persistence
instilled through adolescence, now
reborn,
raw,
thrice bitten,
unattached,
unhinged,
unwritten

Apostasy Now: Redux

There’s an innocence about her

To cause hesitation in myself

Once a fragile man, hardened

By the extreme conditions

In this cruel vain wasteland

Of the users and used up, torn

Between the desire to close in

And the fear of losing sight

Of who I am, a mistake

I long not to repeat

But a predicament to reoccur

Throughout this strange life

For everything repeats

Not just history

Still Smokin’

c&c

I began watching Cheech and Chong films
at an early age, too young to even know
the medicinal properties of cannabis.
But I knew I wanted to live my life
just like them.

Sure, they had outrageous dreams
like anyone else, but they were out there
really living life without hesitation 
and didn't stagnate in the workforce
like so many of us.
They made money where they could
while getting high and chasing women
through the streets. 

So it should come as no surprise that
in my late twenties while renting a house
on Buffalo's west side
I'd been busted on several occasions
by the same two cops 
driving around with my roommate Tony
getting high and chasing women 
through the streets.

These two cops were cool.
They had bigger things to worry about
like junkies, rapists and killers.

They'd always let us go,
only to pull us over a week later,
smile and say

"Well, if it isn't Cheech and Chong"

A Human just Being

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I tend to doze off

Like a carefree cat

Any chance I get

Mostly out of boredom

With the working world

My body is well rested

I lack no sleep

Mind empty every night

To awaken thirsting

For knowledge, balanced hearth

And of unfiltered compassion

For all creatures sharing Earth